Don’t Want to Marry Gran-Ma-Ma

17 Jun

Two of Paw-Paw’s stories. . .

Don’t Want to Marry Gran-ma-ma

One day Gabbie spied Tee Pierre sitting on a log, on the bye-you.  He had a hand full of acorn and was throwing them one at a time in the water.  And when Gabbie got there he tried to avoid his eyes.  So Gabbie sat down next to him, picked up a hand full of acorns too and started to throw his in the water too.

Then he says to Tee Pierre, told you old nonc what the matter.  Poor Tee Pierre he tries to hide der tears in his eyes, but can’t.  So he said I won’t be able to marry up with my Adeline.  Gabbie raise his eyes, and say why not you can’t marry Adeline?  Tee Pierre answered, cause she is my Gran-ma-ma.  You must be crazy man says Gabbie.  She is jest you tuid cuzzin.  I know dat says Tee Pierre.  Das how come I say that she is my gran-ma-ma.  Waal dan told me what makes you tank that.

Waal says Tee Pieere, it’s lak dis.  You see my pappy he done gone and marry my mommy, what is hes fust cuzzin.  Yas says Gabbie.  I know dat.  Waal if my mommy is my pappy fust cuzzin dan she is my second cussin.  Yas says Gabbie.  Waal dang ran-ma-ma is tuid cuzzin han?  Yas I guess so says Gabbie.  Waal dan if my tuid cuzzin is my gran-ma-ma dan my Adeline is my grand-ma-ma.

Waal says Gabbie jest cause she is you tuid cuzzin don mean that she is you gran-ma-ma.  Not all of you tuid cuzzin is you gran-ma-ma.  No says Tee Pierre, some is my granpa-pa.  How is dat says Gabbie?  Waal says Tee Pierre, you see my mommy done gone and marry my pappy that is her first cuzzin.  Dat makes hem my second cuzzin, han?  Yas says Gabbie.  Waal dan hes pappy is my tuid cuzzin and my gran-pa-pa.

Gabbie he gets up slowly throws all the acorn dat he got left at one time, ketches Tee Pierre by the collar wit wan han and by the seat of his pants with the nudder and throws him in the bye-you.  Now thank dat out.

I’m Grand-pa-pa’s Grandpa-pa

Gabbie looked out of his door and seen Tee Pierre sitting on a log and saw dat he was throwing acorns in the water.  Hum he mused to his self.  It don look lack he soaked long enough.  I aught to throw hem in the bye-you some more.

So he tooked hes-self to where Tee Pierre wuz.  He sit himself down and says waal Tee Pierre how you feel han?  Tee Pierre says not to pretty good.  Waal why not you don feel to pretty good han?

Wall it’s all this figgern that make me feel bad.  Waal dan says Gabbie what you ban figger on now?  Tee Pierre says about gran-pa-pa.  What bout you gran-pa-pa?  Waal it lack this.  My pappy he done gone and marry my mommy what is hes fust cuzzin.  Hole on now says Gabbie if you gonna tole me the story bout Adeline being you gran-ma-ma, I’m gonna trow you in the bye-you to soak some mo.

No no says Tee Pierre, dat not it.  But I been tanking, if my gran-pa is my tuid cuzzin, dan I’m hes tuid cuzzin han?  Waal I guess so says Gabbie.  Waal dan says Tee Pierre if he is my gran-pa-pa dan I mus be hes gran-pa-pa, han?  Pauve view Gabbie he is so frustratred he don know what to do so he jus pik Tee Pierre by the collar weit wan hand and by der seat of der pant weit the nudder and trow hem in the bye-you to soak some mo.


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